Tough love

Where's my WD-XL ?

A brush is a brush

Because you have more money than you need.

Street sign

Dick Clark was there, too.

Talking out of school

Everybody's a critic

Vacation burnout

Hi !

Boston TEA Party. TEA!

It's not hard at first

Cowboy-speak

Trolling through the park

The rabbit is alive and well

Sorry, PJ

My cup over-runneth

A puzzlement

What could go wrong?

Hot Jupiter? No, Uranus.

Monkey spankers needed

Cat's out of the bag

You can lick 'em, too!

D'oh!

They grow up so fast

Barfy dug it up and ate it, anyway

Maybe even too much

The yolk's on Granma

Playing the disenchanted card

Porn to be wild

Mommy knows best

The Showdown

All Non-Africans Part Neanderthal, Genetics Confirm

.
Whenever I'm with a Neanderthal chick,
my Cro-magnon gonads start stalling.
It's not so much that her brow is too thick,
but that New Jersey accent's appalling.

He was shovel ready

Batteries not included

Parenting skills

Michigan cuts off unlimited welfare

"I'm headin' out to Illinois, ma."
"Why you be doin' that, boy?"
"Well, ma, they's cuttin' off permanent welfare here like wringin' a chicken's neck. I can only support us so much by food stamp resales, check forgery, drug dealin', benefit fraud, muggin', burglary, armed robbery, counterfeitin' and fencin' stolen merchandise."
"Well, I swan. What you gonna do, boy?"
"I don't know, ma. It's not like I have any skills."
"Well, I swan."

Remodeling

Pep talk

Disenchanted

Baby food

For want of a nail

Ant that the truth

Whew

An owly bird gets the pane

...and he crashed with a hoot
and an -oh, shit- splat
of flurried powder down.

Dig it

Chocolate C'thulhu

.
His entourage was all the rage
with weekly bouts of deophage.
Yet, each one having had his fill,
god extant was unchanged still.