Postal service: Worker stole $20,000 in stamps for mortgage
"Pssst. Hey, you...come over here."
"What? What do you want? Are you selling something?"
"Yeah. Hey, listen, I got half-priced love."
"Half-price? How much you got?"
"A hunnert dollars worth for fifty bucks."
"What kind of love?"
"Well, it's like you won't have to lick 'em."
"I really hadn't planned on licking them..."
"All you have to do is peel 'em and stick 'em."
"Oooo! I like that. Where are they?"
"I got 'em right here."
"That's just a roll of stamps."
"Yeah, but hey, they're LOVE stamps."
"Say, aren't you my mailman?"
"It's the haircut. Everybody thinks I'm their mailman. Well, I'm outta here."
"Bye now. Dang...that's some haircut..."
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