[Laughter]
....But, I wanna tell ya, it's gettin' really, really, weird out there.
[Audience: How weird is it?]
[Laughter]
.... It is sooooo weird. I mean the Jerusalem Post reports that Iran paid Kazakhistan $25 million for two tactical nuclear warheads. .... Now, we're not talking Bikini Atoll here, folks. Tactical is more like "saving our bullets for the wounded." For twelve and a half million per hit, Netanyahu will *sell* you the real estate!
[Laughter]
.... Then the Iranians brought in some Argentinians to work on the warheads. Argentinians? What is that? Are the gauchos herding neutrons on the pampas, now?
[Laughter]
.... I mean, where's the BEEF?
[Laughter]
.... But the Argentinians can't figure out how to get the warheads open to see what makes them work. Engineer .... Turkan, chairman of the defense industries said the Argentinians were "lazy, greedy, and egotistical." .... Isn't there a word in Iranian for "inexperienced?"
[Laughter]
.... Then Turkan "expressed hope that the group of experts from Russia that arrived in Iran will not cause these problems." Hey, you void the warranty with cheap help, then want Mother to fix? Ayatollah you, but you woona listen.
[Laughter]
.... And, according to Publius, those seals are in fact KGB security locks placed on the warheads to prevent them from being used without authorization [Strategic Investments 1994]. .... The Iranians paid the Khazaks $25 million for two large, heavy, radioactive paperweights.
[Laughter]
.... So the Iranians gave them to the Chinese in return for nuclear and missile technology (which the Chinese got thanks to Bill Clinton). The Chinese want the bombs for the "sole purpose of studying KGB security seals."
.... You say Irani, I say Iraqi. .... Let's call the whole thing off.
[Laughter] [Commercial]
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